Wednesday 30 October 2013

The Miracle of the Rejuvenated Vagina – The Baseline for Supernatural Believability

 I have often asked my theist friends, especially the Christian ones, if there is a miracle or supernatural assertion which is just too ridiculous to believe. One which not only defies the laws of nature (the very definition of a miracle), but also descends into the absurd (arguably an alternate definition), a miracle which, simply believing it could be true is an indictment on one’s intelligence. I think I may have stumbled up on such a miracle recently – and I call it the miracle of the rejuvenated vagina.


A picture being circulated on Facebook,
presumably depicting a vaginal blessing. 
Some time ago, veteran Jamaican journalist Ian Boyne interviewed a Jamaican pastor by the name of “bishop” Perry on his Religious Hardtalk program. Bishop Maurice Perrier had gained some amount of notoriety in Kingston from performing "miracles" via his deliverance sessions at his church. In the episode in question, Bishop Perrier was joined in studio by a handful of his congregants who had experienced a "healing" from him at some point in the past. One of the church sisters present at the interview told the story of how Bishop Perrier used his healing to remove a demon from her vagina which wasn't producing enough lubricant to allow the marriage to function smoothly. Bishop Perrier cast out the demon and water sprung forth from the well. 

Do you find this story a bit incredulous? I personally think it's utter bullshit. But I'm not selective about miracles; I group them all in the same category - implausible. If you're reading this and you believe in any sort of miracle however, you'd have to explain why it is you reject the miracle of the rejuvenated vagina but accept the others. It meets all the basic requirements of a miracle - defies logic, unverifiable, and unwitnessed by a single credible source. Further, if demons can possess and take over an entire body, or even several at a time, what's to stop them from commandeering a single vagina? I've heard stories of demons who've started fires, thrown furniture, and even caused natural disasters. Surely, turning a middle aged vagina into an arid wasteland should be child's play.

The Yardie Skeptics are proposing that the miracle of the rejuvenated vagina serve as the baseline for supernatural believability. Call it the minimum threshold which must be accepted before one can move on to accepting other more elaborate miracles. If you have trouble accepting the rejuvenated vagina, then it makes no sense to move on to believing other miracles. Unless you can craft a reasonable objection to this story of cervical demonic possession, then, as a miracle believer, you have to accept it as true. Once you find that reasonable objection, apply liberally to all the other miracles you accept and watch them gradually vanish into thin air.

Cool Dude.